This is an issue of The Wonder Reader, a magazine in which our editors recommend a set of stories to pique your curiosity and delight you. Register here get it every saturday morning.
There are times when you meet friends for a long-planned dinner. And then there are times you invite them over just to hang out while you fold clothes. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate the second option.
Friendship in adults can feel like an organizational task. We meet for lunch, make dinner reservations weeks in advance, or spend the day trying to find a time that works for everyone. The activity itself becomes the point. Julie Beck recently wrote about another kind of social life: one built around doing nothing in particular. Maybe you’re sitting on the couch while a friend is answering an email, you’re chatting while someone is packing for a trip, helping to prepare dinner. What you do is not very important. What is important is to invite someone into the normal parts of your life instead of waiting for an event that you feel deserves an invitation.
Today’s magazine explores how some of the best time we spend with other people happens not when we have planned something special, but when we give them a chance in the middle of a normal day.
On the Joint
Fold clothes with me!
By Julie Beck
A case of social life with low standards
Americans Need to Celebrate More
By Ellen Cushing
We don’t do what we used to do. You can be the change we need. (From 2025)
The Paradox of Friendship
By Olga Khazan
We all want more time with our friends, but we spend too much time alone. (From 2024)
Still Curious?
- A century of anti-socialism: Americans are now spending more time alone than ever, Derek Thompson wrote last year. It is changing our personalities, our politics, and even our relationships into reality.
- A group of friends lies: Many people desire a staff, but having one is not common, writes Jenny Singer.
Other detours
PS
My colleague Isabel Fattal recently asked readers to share a photo of something that evokes their sense of wonder in the world. “Camas in a Garry Oak Meadow in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. Beautiful!'” Helen M., from Victoria, writes.
We will continue to focus on your responses in the coming weeks.
– Rafaela
